(This is the only picture I have of Jennifer and I. We are trick-or-treating as a munchkin from the wizard of oz and a cheerleader.)

There is this story about Jennifer and I. We lived down the street from each other and have been very good buddies for a very long time. We played every day. Literally. We were about 4 or 5 years old, we decided “today is a great day to make some mischief.”

In one day, (ironically Friday the 13th) Jennifer and I decided to enhance the inside of my mom’s kitchen pantry with our artwork. Then I let Jennifer cut my hair. I agreed with the understanding that I got to cut her long thick blonde hair too. After she massacred my hairs, I turned to her and she actually said “no way!”. Sneaky sneaky Jennifer. And last but not least, we were determined to help clean the carpet in the bonus room of my house. With Toothpaste. My mom was just a little ticked off. And Jennifer’s dad swore he would never let us play together again. But of course since we both didn’t play with anyone else, each other is all we had. So we both cried, begged and pleaded to play again. It took about two weeks for her dad to give in.

Well I have been trying to ignore the matter, but it looks like Elliott is workin his way up the repeat chart. The morning time is now called “trixy time” in our home. Ethan and I are total night owls, which in parent life means you can only go so many days on 5 hours of sleep a night before you totally crash. Ethan crashed right before the kids and I left for CA for Christmas. That early morning, when Ethan was asleep on the sofa, Elliott got into my sewing stuff. He chopped up the dress I was slaving over for Neela’s Christmas gift. He also found some hard candy I was hiding in the sewing stuff. He sucked on it, then wrapped it up in the dress’ skirt. And there was one more thing that happened that early morning, but I have blocked it from my memory - cause I cant remember what it is. This kind of behavior happens almost once a month.

Well Elliott was a little over due for his usual exploration. So much so that as I was laying in bed this morning, I didn’t even think about the possibility that he could be reeking havoc. This month, it was my turn to pass out past comprehension. Seriously, I remember waking up at about 4 to sooth Roland, but I don’t remember feeding him that empty bottle that lay by my pillow when I woke up. I don’t remember Ethan taking a shower in our bathroom, or him kissing me goodbye. And of course I don’t remember Elliott coming in our room. I do remember however giving him a bowl of fruit, but I have no clue when that was. Was Ethan still home? Did I give it to him then go back to bed? When I woke up (at about 8:45 - at least an hour after Ethan left for work) Elliott’s hands were very wet and slippery. I asked him what it was and he said it was lotion from my bathroom. And of course he didn’t go for the lotion I let him use. I found out soon after - OF COURSE he went for the Gold Bond. ALL over his hands and feet. Lucky he didn’t put it on his cheeks too. After washing his hands I turn to find this:

Sorry to tell you this way Ethan, but your beloved untouched Pumpkin Pie is now toast. Unless of course you want to close your eyes and pray Elliott had washed his hands knowing the importance as exploring the culinary arts.

Then he found the string of packaged condoms. I asked him what he thought they were and he said “ummm chocolate?” uhhh….. No. No no no. Then I look at the computer and its gone all crazy. He was obviously pushing anything and everything. “hmmmm that one looks fun - I’ll push that one. And that one. Again. And again…. Again again again wow this is fun!”

I gotta look at the bright side. At least is was just a pie, and he was safe with the lotion and he didn’t open any of the packages strung together. And the computer is just fine. Thank goodness he didn’t leave out the front door - since he can now unlock and open the front door as well as open the gate. And he isn’t afraid of leaving the property without us. I guess this is all just another unfriendly reminder to go to bed at a normal time.