Ever since my daily commute started including late night rides on the highway (some of my classes don’t get out until 10:00 pm), Carol has been wanting me to upgrade beyond the Vespa. As much as I loved the Vespa (and I loved the Vespa), I had to concede that she was right.

Around town, the Vespa was a dream. From 0 to 40 mph, no problem. None. It’s hard to overstate how well-made and fun those things are. It didn’t take long until it was my primary mode of transportation. And how can you go wrong with any vehicle that can get more than 70 miles to a gallon? It helps, too, that Portland is a rider’s town. With so many bicycles and motorcycles on the road, we live in an area that is uniquely designed for two-wheeled vehicles. More than being fun, I felt safe.

That is, until my daily commute started taking me south on Highway 217 instead of east into downtown. As great as the Vespa was at lower speeds, it was soft from 40 to 60 mph and, frankly, a little scary. I don’t think the little four-stroke engine was ever intended to sustain highway speeds on a regular basis. And even when I was topped out and keeping up with freeway traffic, it was just plain impossible to accelerate. This made my rides a bit more frightening, since it limited my options if something went wrong.

So, I started dreaming about a bike. Truth be told, I started dreaming about a bike way before it became a necessity. Like every other pre-middle-aged young man, I fell in love with the motorcycle in Garden State:

That thing is made by Ural, just so you know. Eventually, I started drooling over the Triumph Bonneville. Specifically, this one:

That exact image was my desktop background forever. More than anything, we wanted something classic. None of this Suzuki street bike garbage. We wanted something that hearkened back to the beatnik cafe racers and rat bikes of the 50’s and early 60’s.

Even though we happen to live within a mile of the area’s largest Harley-Davidson dealership, I don’t think either of us considered a Harley even once. Like most people our age, we have no interest in Harley’s leather-clad outlaw branding which hasn’t been updated since the 70’s. But one day, while I was riding by, I saw this:

At first I thought it was a restored classic, which I found intriguing, so I pulled over. I learned right away that it’s actually a new bike called a Nightster, part of the Sportster line. Harley-Davidson recognizes that their demographic is aging, so they have spent the last few years updating the old Sportsters, aimed squarely at a younger demographic. Here’s the ad for the newly released Iron 883:

Hook, line, and sinker. And then came the test ride, and I fell in love. All of the things I used to hate about Harleys don’t exist on this bike. Primarily, they are finally ditching the chrome, which has always driven me nuts. But way, way, way more importantly, the engine is finally rubber-mounted, rather than being bolted directly to the frame. This has been a Harley hang-up for years. They dropped the seat by several inches and pulled the foot controls back. They also dropped all of the accessories and meaningless add-ons. The evolving Harley is stripped down, blacked-out, and basic. And I say it’s about time they got back to their roots:

So, I’m a Harley rider now. They even threw the jacket in the deal. But no tattoos, no leather, and I still have (and plan on keeping) all of my teeth. I should probably start a motorcycle club for nerds.